Hardly the Best of Self

Dear Readers (if there are any),

Do you also sometimes feel like a word that consists of four letter and that I don’t want to spell out here? Today certainly is one of these days. Some people would say they had gotten out of bed on the wrong leg, but I feel like I have gotten into life on the wrong path from beginning. Now I have always been someone not easily accepting my fate and hesitating about my talents, decisions, and all. There is this nice word in German for that: “hadern”, which means not accepting, not being satisfied, challenging and defying. I’ve had better and worse phases of this, and recently, I have entered the worst ever. But don’t worry, this is not the place to talk about this.

Anyway, today is a rough day at work, and I have hardly been the best of myself for a few months now. This really shows in my work. I am used to being a very good worker, hardworking, motivated, enthusiastic, always on top of all my tasks, thinking ahead, and whatnot. Well, not right now. My boss tells me I have to do things better, for the first time ever in my career. I feel so bad about it, and I know he is right. Just, how? 

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